6. Rags to Riches (at the beep)

I know I've accepted God's will for my life because if he calls me to a life of sorrow... I'll learn to accept it.

If he takes my life tomorrow.. I'll be ok with that.

If God took all my money, all my family, and everything I ever had and known and loved I would have no choice but to accept his will

And you know why?

BECAUSE HE GAVE IT ALL TO ME

No matter how much of a "good person" I try to be, nothing compares to the eternal life that lies ahead of me the day my heart stops beating. 

Anyone who tries to keep his life will lose it. Anyone who loses his life will keep it. 

Luke 17:33

What good is gaining the whole world but losing your soul?

If you want to save your life, you will lose it. But if you lose your life for God and the gospel, you will save it.

In Mark chapter 8 Jesus tells his disciples of how they think about "human things"

Isn't that all we stress about? 

Homework

Grades

Boys

Girls

Kids

Health

Money

School

Money

Money

And again.. Money

You ever think how there's no stress in heaven? Because they aren't HUMAN, there's no worries! 

COLOSSIANS 3:2 🙌

A main source of stress for EVERYONE is 

MONEY 

Even I stress about money on occasion, I try not to but it's an old habit that's dying hard. 

What I do understand is that I do not under any circumstance LOVE money, times I find myself stressing about money but what for? 

I have a roof over my head

Food in my stomach

& I'm alive

One day I'll be rich, but I'll love humbly.

That is all.  

5. Goin Off

To many of you I knew in highschool

To the other few who knew me in middle school 

& to those others who are reading this blog.

I am not the same person I was in highschool.

I apologize for the inconvenience.

Yea I changed. 

And you know why?

*warning I get a tad hectic*

Because if Jesus came back tomorrow,

 I REFUSED to be here on earth with so many of y'all confused as to why I didn't get picked to go to heaven and am now forced to face 7 years of literal hell on earth. 

I am not going to wonder why I missed the rapture and be crying with my family hoping to make it when the years are over.

I'm going up to heaven takin all my folk! 

-word to Canton Jones

I mean think about it 

Jesus literally could come back as soon as you're done reading this blog

& are you gonna be chosen to go to heaven?

I know I am. 

Cuz hell on earth is no place for me 

Neither is dying twice but you get the pictur.

So yes, I changed.

Yes, you may not like it.

Yes, I LOVE the new me.

And NO, I will not care what you think about it.

A few people have told me "you've changed and I don't like it." 

And yes this is a true story, 

I don't understand why people couldn't be happy for me. I never forced anyone to change for me, I simply accepted those I loved as they were and if they felt the need to change I would stick with them every step of the way.

Why are people upset that I now actually love my life?

Well my bad I wanted to get my life together and help those around me along with myself make it to heaven.

My bad, 

I've repented which is why I do not curse, drink, smoke, have sex, etc.

& before you say "well you've done those before" 

Hence the word "repent" meaning I've turned away from those sins regardless of my past.

 

No I am not saying I'm better than you, what I'm saying is if I can do it and be unashamed I'm hoping to encourage you to as well. 

I would hate to see anyone I love be thrown into hell, no no no, not on my watch!

"I've changed, and things ain't the same. & ever since she came around you never wanna hang" 

Boo hoo life goes on

I'm not bitter. 

I'm happy you're happy, keep being happy, 

I'm happy too! lol my life is great, 

It's not perfect, but I am blessed

And by "blessed" I mean I have a roof over my head, joy in my heart, a family that loves me, and amazing teammates who are always there for me. 

It's the simple things I am so grateful for, but we'll get to that in another blog..

Every thing that has happened to me within the past 4 months that should have been negative, I have learned I make the best of.

Losing a few hundred dollars, losing some of my closest friends, losing my first love, internal conflicts, petty things, & I really can't think of anything else really because when bad things happen to me I view them as what I like to call 

"Blessings in disguise"

Meaning I know the suffering I endure now just means God has a greater plan for me.

So to those who think I have changed and no longer would like to associate with me, I will pray for you

You still have a friend in me and I'll always be there, I try my best to keep my promises.

To those I do not know, I know the words of my 18 year old feeling 52 wisdom have rubbed off somewhat. 

As I come to a close of this blog I would like to know if Jesus came back, in 10 seconds.......

Would you go to heaven ?

In September 2013 this video helped to the beginning of my changed life http://youtu.be/ANTctnIHY_A 

God truly changed me, from the inside out. 

I wasn't born sinning, but I became a sinner. Now kI'll live better than that. 

Swear.

4. I'm the man

(Poem)

I want a man who is not afraid to get formally acquainted with his soul
I want a man who is willing to introduce himself to himself after lying to himself was previously sighing at himself crying at the mirror image of himself but before dying himself when he is discovering himself loves meeting himself
the only man above him is God himself and when he can tell the world he is weak the meekness in his soul will then blend with mine
I want a man whose heart may intertwine once broken now whole he found his soul
because I want a man who does not care what the guys think when he can no longer spend time with them because in his mind is the obligation he must abide by or he will see his love leave right before his eyes
I want a man who respects me
willing to wait for me
unashamed of me
tells other females about me
I want a man who screams my name so the heavens can hear

as if they weren't the ones who sent him to me


I want a man who is willing to turn down a good time for eternal life

I want a MAN

He will anger me
but the sight of him will erase all fright
His voice will calm me and make me mellow as I close my eyes and grasp the still extraordinary fact that we finally found one another

I'm the man for you
I'm the man who God created for you
I'm the man who will never break your heart
I'm the man and you are my woman and why nothing ever worked out with anyone else makes as much sense as why I met you in the first place because when I see your face my worries go away
I may stress and we may have struggles but together we will overcome the mountain
as deep as the ocean I will go
whatever it will take for you to know
like a hidden treasure
you've stolen my heart
Because of you I know love is four words other than itself & I

Lost myself
Only to find you & I
Value you in
Each forsaken way

As the veins in my arteries begin working harder than an ant for his queen and I believe you are 300 times me
I am your king and pharaoh  and nothing can come between us as long as we put as much faith in our love as our faith in the Lord our lives we owe from here on out we can only grow


So to my soul mate of whom I've yet to have the pleasure of meeting
Rejoice in the thought of me
Praise the weeks you wept
and the weary nights
Thank those we met who lacked symmetry
as the absence of light in those once harmful situations
will lead you to me
and we will have no limitations

I want a man who is not afraid
to live
to love
to praise
to prosper
to rejoice
to work
to lurk
of me
of life
of death

I patiently long for the scent of you after mowing fresh grass
the sight of the tear dancing down your cheek at the end of the aisle
the mist of the sweet kiss as your lips grace  my forehead
and the sound of our son laughing at your almost funny jokes

Together we can live once rather than perish twice
For him I will wait

3. Blog for the Ville

As I was sitting here thinking of a topic for my next blog

I thought 

I love poetry, 

But I asked myself

"Well what do people want to read about" 

Then I thought..